I’m having a reasonable amount of beer. to celebrate the eve of the football season, and because, like mt everest, the beer was there. because it was there.

there’s a different mood on fb now than there was in early March, when I last had frequented it. there was a kind of silly exuberance back then that no longer prevails. in fact, some critters from back then have gone off of fb. so, you see, life goes on. you can’t go home. you can’t step in the same river twice, especially if the river went home. the river can go home, but not you.

in my spare time, I like to conflate things.

if you want, here’s the unpublished or briefly published draft I wrote last night after my date:

there’s something satisfying about a date that is a complete and utter miss. like, even if you had both been in peak form, it would’ve been exactly the same amount of bad.

not all charismatic people are boring. some are quite interesting. but this was a boring charismatic person. this was, one of those people who is involved in “the arts.”

she was pleasant, outgoing, fairly talkative, not someone who had to be dragged along in conversation… but someone I had no curiosity about and who had no curiosity about me. but she could still go through the motions competently. even fluently. and there was nothing really awful about her. we actually might have had an ok conversation if she was my cousin at a family reunion or something. yes of course people like her probably at times play an important role in things that are worthwhile.

at one point she was talking about something arts related, having to do with management, government relations stuff, I’m laughing, and talking about it with a minimal healthy skepticism and displeasure about some of the details, but then I accidentally said something direct like “that kind of stuff is just not interesting to me” and I didn’t mean it to be directed at her exactly. but she was perhaps taken aback by the what I would call totality and appropriate simplicity of my indifference to something she’s tangentially involved in.

in the draft I say there was nothing awful about her, but in further hindsight, I’m not sure. she may or may not have been awful. I mean, not like “burn a quran day” awful. not on that scale. then again, who knows. awfulness is fungible. awfulness anywhere is a threat to non-awfulness everywhere.